01
Chapter One
A Rumbling Within
The Belcher discovers his ability to blast guttural waves of decimation and becomes a vigilante.
OVERSERVED UNDERDOG
The BelcherA novel by Luke Schmaltz
Marvel-influenced punk rock fiction. Stan Lee meets Charles Bukowski, set loose on downtown Denver. This newly edited, illustrated edition, featuring art by John Mazzucco is now available.
Fulfilled by Amazon and other major retailers. See every audiobook outlet.
HEMISPHERE ONE
Literature
The Belcher, an illustrated new edition, its cast of biological super freaks, sample chapters, reviews and the full audiobook.
ENTER THE BOOKS →
HEMISPHERE TWO
Music
Twenty-five years fronting King Rat, solo sets of originals, videos, and the songs written for The Belcher audiobook.
ENTER THE MUSIC →Synopsis
A long-brewing clash between a Mile-High music legend and an aggressive government censor has come to a head, as Pablo Vasquez, aka The Soothsayer, must contend with the diabolical Blatherskite and his minions. To bolster his crusade, Vasquez recruits Earl Danners, a prolific beer drinker with a burgeoning talent for belching forth sonic blasts of guttural decimation.
The Soothsayer and The Belcher encounter other outcasts and biological super freaks, and form a rag-tag team of vigilantes with Knockers, Red-eye Robinson, The Whine-o and an alluring femme fatale named Cricket. Together they align against the ranks of the Environmental Agency of Restrictions and a stench-spewing super villain known as The Gasser. The face of downtown Denver will never again be the same.
The Cast
ALL CHARACTERS →
The Belcher
Drinks beer and fights injustice with supersonic belch-blasts of guttural decimation.
The Soothsayer
An old-school musician who does not suffer fools.
Cricket
A street thief armed with a deadly secret.
Red-eye Robinson
Old-school tunes of heartache and woe, strong enough to bring grown men to their knees.
MOTION TEASERS
The art, animated
Short animated teasers built from John Mazzucco's original illustrations.
The Belcher
Earl Danners finds his voice at the end of the bar.
The Soothsayer
Pablo Vasquez exhales a prophecy in iambic pentameter.
Cricket
Daphne something or other, chained up and unbothered.
Jimmy Jiggs
Six strings, no flesh, all voltage.
LISTEN FIRST
Hear the first three chapters
Read by the author, mixed with sound effects, ambient tones and original music.
02
Chapter Two
A Man in a Hat: Introduction to the Soothsayer, Part One
The Belcher's soon-to-be mentor tracks him down at work.
03
Chapter Three
The Soothsayer: Part Two
Pablo Vasquez, aka The Soothsayer, demonstrates his BANE to get The Belcher's attention.
What people said
“Packed with punk filth, pulp grit, and the darkest humor this side of death itself, The Belcher is the drunken chronicle of an ultraviolent miscreant of a hero, the kind the 21st century has forgotten but truly needs.”
“This is a real gem for troubadours. It is Kafkaesque, super-human, high ladder bullet-train to absurdity and yet it has a worldly critique baiting us by the pop grammatology of Hollywood. Utterly enjoyable, but only for the ‘uncommitted.’”
“Take one shot superhero mythology for the modern age, one shot of ‘Fritz the Cat’-style sleaze humor and mix thoroughly in a trash can, and you’ve got ‘The Belcher.’ As a writer for Modern Drunkard Magazine, Luke Schmaltz has already established himself as a top-tier tastemaker of all things down and dirty, be it a martini or a street fight, and with ‘The Belcher’ his literary voice finds a fitting everyman character in Earl, a ramshackle drunk with a throat of vengeance. Prepare to be entertained.”
In the press
ALL COVERAGE →ARTICLEWestword: King Rat frontman Luke Schmaltz pens first novel, The BelcherARTICLEWestword: Luke Schmaltz honored as a Colorado CreativeARTICLEWestword: Colorado bookstores recommend local booksARTICLEWestword: Punk rock literally saved Luke Schmaltz's lifeARTICLEAlbuquerque Journal: Battle royal, a crew of outcasts must stop the advancing forces of evilARTICLEColorado Punk Rock Army: Punk LegendsARTICLEHybrid MagazinePODCASTCafe Crash Podcast with Daniel CrosierPODCASTModern Drunkard Podcast: Old Crow and Miller Lite with Luke SchmaltzARCHIVEModern Drunkard Magazine article archiveARTICLEWestword: King Rat frontman Luke Schmaltz pens first novel, The BelcherARTICLEWestword: Luke Schmaltz honored as a Colorado CreativeARTICLEWestword: Colorado bookstores recommend local booksARTICLEWestword: Punk rock literally saved Luke Schmaltz's lifeARTICLEAlbuquerque Journal: Battle royal, a crew of outcasts must stop the advancing forces of evilARTICLEColorado Punk Rock Army: Punk LegendsARTICLEHybrid MagazinePODCASTCafe Crash Podcast with Daniel CrosierPODCASTModern Drunkard Podcast: Old Crow and Miller Lite with Luke SchmaltzARCHIVEModern Drunkard Magazine article archive
Latest news
ALL UPDATES →August 1, 2026
An illustrated third edition of The Belcher is on the way
The Belcher is being republished as an illustrated edition, complete with a new cover and a full set of character illustrations commissioned from John Mazzucco.
August 1, 2026
The sequel arrives this fall
A follow-up novel is in the works and slated for release this fall. The first book is being relaunched ahead of it so new readers can start at the beginning.
January 15, 2021
The Belcher audiobook is available everywhere
All 45 chapters are read by the author and come complete with sound effects, ambient tones and original music, mixed and engineered by longtime King Rat bandmate Mike Makkay.
PICK YOUR POISON
Get The Belcher
Paperback
The physical book, fulfilled by Amazon and major retailers.
Kindle eBook
Instant download, read it anywhere on any device.
Audiobook
All 45 chapters read by the author, on 18 outlets.
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